Overcoming Fears
by GKJ
Summary: [Notice - Chapter 5 will be the last chapter for now.] A tale about the love in Jing Mei's life, with a twist. This is my first fic, so please take heart. R/R
1. A Unexpected Love

"A Unexpected Love"  
Chapter 1/?   
joliefan4life@hotmail.com   
Spoilers: Nope, I don't think so.   
Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own any of these characters. If I did, I'd be a very rich woman now and you'd be   
seeing this story on TV. :)   
Warning: Contains a F/F Relationship.   
  
  
"Time of death; 5:29." Carter announced as I walked from the room, snapping off my gloves and throwing   
them into a nearby bin. I sighed heavily; the little was boy only five.   
  
"Deb," Carter said as he fell into step with me. "We did everything we could. The kid had severe head   
trauma. If he had survived, he'd be in a vegetative state for the rest of his life. We tried, you know that."   
  
I bowed my head "I know, but he was so small John. I just wish..." I sighed. "Never mind, are the parents   
here?"   
  
"Yes," he said. "But I'll tell them, you go take a breather." He smiled weakly at me and before I had the   
chance to protest, he disappeared down the hallway.   
  
I grabbed at my blood-splattered scrubs and pulled them off me, trashing them in the same bin with the   
gloves. The past few weeks had been a draining few. Traumas were coming in everyday, every one was   
worse then the last. School shootings, gang fights, fires, train wrecks. Everything seemed to be piling up   
and County had to send everyone who was able to move, to Mercy.   
  
I pushed open the door to the lounge and there she sat, cup of coffee in her hand. All my emotions were in   
full gear; I didn't know what I was doing. Every time I saw her, my heart skipped a beat.   
  
Desire. Longing. Lust. Love.   
  
Jesus, Chen. What the hell are you thinking here? Its Abby. A-B-B-Y. What the hell do you want with her?   
  
She cut through my thoughts as she spoke. "Things getting rough out there?" She asked as I sat down at the   
table.   
  
"Yeah," I said with a sigh, looking down at my hands. She gave me a concerned look and I shook my head.   
"We just lost a five year old boy." I said quietly.   
  
"Oh...I'm sorry." She said and put her hand on mine, patting it gently. I froze at the human contact. She   
gave me a friendly smile and removed her hand. I was still frozen and suddenly forgot how to breathe. Take   
a deep breath, in...out. In...out.   
  
I was able to regain my composure and sat up straight in the chair. "So how is your night going so far?"   
  
She glanced down at her watch and shifted slightly in her chair. "Almost over actually. 5...4...3...2...1. I'm   
off for the night!" She proclaimed.   
  
I smiled, she was so adorable. She was like a little kid, yet a beautiful mature woman. She could melt   
anyone just by flashing her gorgeous smile. I found it hard to believe she was overlooked so much. Shaking   
off my thoughts, I got up and started fumbling through the fridge.   
  
"Damn it," I swore quietly. "Isn't there anything in here besides beer and expired chips?"   
  
She smiled and stood up from her chair and made her way to the fridge. She looked through it silently. All   
the while I was to control my breathing. She spun on her heel and looked me in the eyes. " Well, dahling,"   
She said smiling like a fool. "I'll just have to take you out to eat. When are you off?"   
  
I did a total double take. What did she just say? What the hell? I shook my head at her. "No, Abby that's not   
necessary. I'll find something around here..." I said, motioning around the room.   
  
She smiled and took my hand holding it lightly. "Jing Mei, I insist." I nodded and then she quietly   
continued. "Now, what time do you get off?"   
  
"30 minutes." I said as my heart pounded in my chest. I probably had a shit-eating grin on my face, for all I   
knew.   
  
"All right then, I'll meet you at the admit desk." Before I got a chance to speak she was out of the room   
leaving me breathless.   
  
I waited out the 30 longest minutes of my life by fixing up a small girl who broke her arm while riding on   
one of those little scooters. Those things should be illegal, I though to myself. She broke her arm in three   
places, not to mention the various cuts and bruises on her face.   
  
I made my way over to the admit desk and as promised, Abby was standing there with her coat on, ready   
and waiting. I shrugged on my coat and smiled at her. "Shall we go?" she asked me quietly. I nodded and   
we silently made our way out to her car. Once comfortably inside we sat for a second until I spoke up.   
  
"So, where are we going?" I wondered looking up at her.   
  
She shifted in her seat for a few seconds, seeming like she was thinking and then answered. "How about   
Nino's? It's only a few blocks from here. They have great food."   
  
I nodded slightly, "Sounds good to me." I said simply.   
  
She started the car and soon we were driving off to the restaurant. We sat in relative silence, commenting   
on the few songs that came through the speakers. Fortunately it was a cherished silence, as we seemed to be   
communicating through quick glances and the like. We grinned at each other from time to time, like we   
could tell what the other was thinking. Though I wasn't at all sure what was going through her mind.   
  
Twenty minutes later, we were sitting at a small booth in the back of the restaurant. After ordering our   
food, I look up from the drink menu and saw Abby, grinning a high schooler's grin at me. "What?" I asked,   
trying not to smile.   
  
"Nothing." She said, shaking her head lightly. "So anyway, what's going on with you?"   
  
I shrugged, "Nothing really I guess. Trying to keep everything together, trying not to have a nervous   
breakdown."   
  
She reached across the table and patted my hand. Jesus, what was with all this contact? Could she read my   
mind? "It'll get better, Jing Mei." She promised.   
  
"I hope so." I said, my voice barely above a whisper.   
  
After finishing our meals Abby and I decided to go for a walk after dropping her car off at her house. I was   
glad, because it would give us a chance to talk without being confined by walls. It also helped that most   
people weren't out this late at night.   
  
"So how's everything going with Luka?" I asked, as I kicked a rock down the street.   
  
"Wait a second. You didn't hear yet? The gossip grubs haven't told you?" She asked. I shook my head   
confused as she continued, "Luka and I called the quits about...a month ago now."   
  
"Oh Abby, I'm sorry...," I said quietly.   
  
She shook her head and gave me a weak smile. "It's all right, really. We both thought it was best. We both   
needed and wanted different things."   
  
Her last sentence rang in my ears. We both needed and wanted different things. "Oh." I whispered as we   
came across a small bridge over a creek. I glanced down at my watch. We had been walking for nearly two   
hours; though it only seemed five minutes.   
  
The moon and its reflection off the water were the only light supply as we walked onto the bridge. As we   
looked across the water, Abby suddenly turned to me. "Jing Mei, I have to tell you something." With that,   
without warning she spun me around and kissed me full on the lips.   
  
As our tongues entwined there was no doubt in my mind that this was one of the best kisses I had ever   
experienced. Neither of us made an attempt to pull away and only did due to lack of air. As we broke apart   
I smiled at her.   
  
"Um...I don't think I caught all that. Can you repeat it please?" I asked grinning.   
  
She nodded in response and pulled me closer. Once again our mouths were meshed together in an explosive   
kiss. I was overcome by desire and had all I could do to keep myself from ripping her clothes off right there   
and then.   
  
"Jesus Christ, woman. Where the hell did you learn to kiss like that?" I asked her as we pulled away once   
more.   
  
"Practice makes perfect!" She exclaimed. "Plus, you're not so bad at it yourself."   
  
I smiled and looked out into the water. What a nice night it was turning out to be. What a wonderfully nice   
night, I thought to myself. I glanced at my watch and almost jumped when I saw the time.   
  
"Uhh...Abby, as much as I hate to end this night...it's getting quite late and I have an early shift tomorrow, I   
think I should start heading home." I said quietly.   
  
She simply nodded and we started to make our way home. The walk was mostly quiet for the most part, not   
really knowing what to say to each other. We entered her house; she called a cab for me and then made   
small talk until it arrived.   
  
We shared one last longing kiss before I got in the car for the extremely lonely ride home. I slipped the key   
inside the lock and opened the door, revealing my dark and empty home. I flicked on the light and made a   
beeline for the kitchen to see if there were any messages.   
  
Much to my dismay, there weren't any. Of course, Jing Mei. Did you think she would call you right after   
you left her house? Don't be silly. I told myself, making my way into the bedroom.   
  
I flopped onto the cold bed and pulled the covers around me, wishing there were someone next to me to   
keep me warm.  
  



	2. 

"Pains of the Heart"  
Chapter 2/?   
joliefan4life@hotmail.com   
Spoilers: Nope, I don't think so.  
Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own any of these characters. If I did, I'd be a very rich woman   
now and you'd be seeing this story on TV. :)   
Warning: Contains a F/F Relationship.  
  
"Anna, this is Doctor Finch and she's going to take you to see your mommy, ok?" I said   
to the small girl next to me.   
  
She nodded in return and flashed a smile my way and then walked off with Cleo as I   
headed to the admit desk. The day was going fairly slow for a change and there was   
absolutely nothing on the board so I decided to take a quick trip to the lounge for some   
coffee.   
  
"Hey!" She exclaimed almost before I was able to set a foot in the room.   
  
I smiled at her; how her face lit up when I entered. "Hey, Abby. How's your day going? I   
just came in here to get a cup of mud flavored coffee, do you want a cup?" I asked as I   
poured the dark liquid.   
  
She shook her head. "No, I'm all set. It's pretty quiet out there, huh?"  
  
"Yeah, hopefully it's not the calm before the storm." I said, sitting down on one of the   
chairs.   
  
She nodded. "Hopefully not. Listen, I had a really nice time last night – A wonderful   
time." She said.  
  
"I did too, I hope we can do it – go out again sometime." I smiled, taking a sip of the   
coffee and grimacing.  
  
"Of course. Well, how about…how about tonight? I mean – if you're not busy…"  
  
"Tonight? Tonight. Tonight is good. No…shit. Dammit, I'm supposed to be having   
dinner with my cousin. I could do something now though, my lunch break's coming up."   
  
"Okay, why don't we just go for a walk now?" She said, standing up to get her coat from   
her locker.  
  
I nodded. "Sure, it's a great day for a walk." I said, following her by getting my coat out   
of my own locker.  
  
Twenty minutes later we were sitting on a bench in the park watching the kids running   
around. "…So the kid was hanging off Luka's arm with his teeth and all the while, two   
security guards were trying to pull him off and give him a shot!" She exclaimed and went   
into a fit of giggles.   
  
"The kid must had very strong teeth to hold on for so long!" I giggled. "Luka must have   
one strong arm too!"  
  
"Oh believe me, he does!" She giggled again. "Ah," She sighed. "That's one of the things   
I miss about Luka, always had strong arms to hold me near." She sighed again. "But it   
truly is for the better…we are now both where we want to be."   
  
"That's good." I said quietly, quickly brushing my hand over hers.  
  
"Jing Mei, I…you know…I really like you." She said, carefully reaching out and   
brushing a strand of hair from my face.   
  
"I really like you too, Abby. I uh…I always have." I smiled nervously.   
"We…uh…should just let this play out though, I don't think either of us wants to get   
hurt."   
  
"No, you're right…we'll just take it slow." She said smiling as she gently put her hand   
over mine. "But…I think we should start heading back, I don't think it would be a good   
idea to get fired." She smiled, and it one full motion pulled herself and me up from the   
bench.  
  
As we were walking back to the hospital Abby started to get a pained look on her face.   
Soon she was as white as a ghost and started breathing hard.   
  
Concerned, I put my hand on her shoulder. "Abby, are you feeling all right?" I asked,   
now fully supporting her weight.  
  
She shook her head quickly and took a deep breath. "No, no I'm not. I don't feel good at   
all…chest…hurts…" She huffed out, and in an instant fell to the ground…  
  



	3. 

"Sleeping Beauty"  
Chapter 3/?   
joliefan4life@hotmail.com   
Spoilers: Nope, I don't think so.   
Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own any of these characters. If I did, I'd be a very rich woman   
now and you'd be seeing this story on TV. :)   
Warning: Contains a F/F Relationship.  
  
"Hey there, Sleepy Head. Glad to see you've finally decided to join us." I said as her eyes   
fluttered open.  
  
"Jing Mei?" She asked. "What are you doing here? What…what am I doing here?   
What—what are all these tubes? What happened?" She asked, a frantic look on her face.  
  
"Abby, it's okay. It's okay…you're in the hospital…you passed out on our way back   
from the walk, remember?"  
  
"Passed out? Why? What do I have?" She asked and grabbed the chart from the bed.  
  
"It's seems you have a syndrome called Fibromyalgia. Do you know what that is?" I   
asked, knowing that it was not a pronounced syndrome and not many people including   
doctors knew about it.  
  
"Fibromyalgia? Oh god…I knew that I'd not been feeling all that well, but I didn't know   
it was anything too serious." She said.  
  
"We're going to keep you overnight for observation and I'm going to get you a   
prescription for Paxil, ok? You need to get you're rest so I'll be back later." I said and   
started to get up from the chair.  
  
Her hand shot out and caught mine, stopping me from moving. "Will you stay, please?"   
She asked almost in a children's voice.  
  
I smiled brightly. She was so cute! "Of course I will, but you need to get some sleep so   
close your eyes and I'll be right here…"   
  
"Thank you…" She said smiling as she closed her eyes and almost immediately fell   
asleep.  
  
A few hours later Carter appeared in the room. "Hey, how's she doing?" He asked, sitting   
down next to me.  
  
"She's doing okay…she's been sleeping for a while." I said watching the monitors.  
  
"Well, you should get some sleep or at least get something to eat…I can stay with her."   
He said.  
  
I shook my head lightly. "No…no. It's okay, I want to stay with her." I said.  
  
"Dave Malucci's been looking for you, he wants to know if you'd like to go to dinner."   
  
I laughed slightly. "Fuck Malucci." I said under my breath.  
  
"I think that's what he'd like you to do." He smiled.  
  
"Very funny, Carter. Don't you have work to do?" I asked pretending to be annoyed.  
  
"No actually, I got off an hour ago. Can't a guy come see how his two friends are doing?"  
  
"We're both doing fine, Carter. You need to go home and get some rest too…you've   
been on all night." I said.  
  
"Yes, Mommy." He chuckled. "Take care of yourself, ok? When she wakes up tell her I   
said hello." He gave my arm a reassuring squeeze and left the room.   
  



	4. Goodnight

"Goodnight"  
Chapter 4/?   
joliefan4life@hotmail.com   
Spoilers: Nope, I don't think so.  
Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own any of these characters. If I did, I'd be avery rich woman   
now and you'd be seeing this story on TV. :)   
Warning: Contains a F/F Relationship.  
  
"Are you feeling all right?" I asked as I handed her a glass of wine. It seemed liked I'd been asking her that   
ever since she returned home from the hospital. I'd been coming over regularly to check on her.  
  
"Jing Mei," She said. "I'm feeling fine. I took my pills like a good little girl, and I'm fine." She smiled   
sweetly.  
  
I shook my head. "All right, all right. I'm sorry." I pouted, taking a sip of wine. "When are you going back   
to work?" I asked.  
  
"Next Monday. Hopefully Weaver won't be on my back when I get back. How was it today?"   
  
"Hectic as usual." I said simply, not wanting to worry her with what was going on at the hospital.  
  
"Oh really? Well you must be stressed then." She raised her eyebrows seductively. "Let's see if I can do   
something about it."  
  
"Just *how* do you plan on doing so?" I asked, giggling as the effects of the wine started to kick in.   
  
"Well…" She moved closer to me. "Like this…" She said as she pressed her lips against mine. "And like   
this…" She carefully parted my lips and soon our tongues were part of a complicated dance.  
  
A million thought raced through my mind. But I couldn't understand any of them. All my energy was   
focused on this woman before me. This beautiful woman who I'd grown to know more about then anyone   
else in just a week. Our relationship was still just beginning but there was such intensity every time I   
touched her. Such passion, such love. I felt like we'd been together for years.  
  
I moaned as she started to lift up my shirt, I could feel the power and heat of her hands. As she started to   
unhook my bra, I stopped her. "Bedroom, now."  
  
"Yes, Ma'am!" She smiled as she stood from the couch and took my hand, leading me into the bedroom.  
  
"I've never done this before..." I breathed as she placed small kisses down my neck.  
  
"I haven't either. But just do what's in your heart and we'll be fine." She lowered my body to the bed and we   
began the newly sacred ritual of removing each other's clothes.  
  
--  
  
We lay in bed, breathless. It was the most wonderful thing I had ever experienced in my life. I turned to   
Abby and smiled. "I don't think I've ever screamed that loudly." I giggled, nuzzling into her shoulder.   
  
"That makes two of us, Jing Mei." She said, kissing me passionately.   
  
I cocked an eyebrow and she nodded. Slowly but surely, I kissed my way down her body.  
  
--  
  
"Oh...My…God!" I said through breaths. "Jesus Christ all mighty!" I said, rolling over on my side.  
  
"Do you think this could count as my physical therapy?" Abby smiled at me and took my hand, rubbing it   
lightly.  
  
"Hmmm…I don't know. Care to try again and find out?" I asked and she nodded.  
  
--  
  
"Mmmm…you make a very nice pillow." Abby said as she snuggled on top of me.  
  
"Why thank you. You make a very nice teddy bear!" I giggled as I squeezed her tight.  
  
"Good night, Jing Mei." Abby kissed the top of my head and then closed her eyes.  
  
"Good night, Abby." I said quietly. * I love you * I added in my mind. I pulled her into a tight hug and   
closed my eyes. To my surprise, I soon fell into a peaceful sleep.  



	5. For the First Time

"For the First Time"  
Chapter 5/?   
joliefan4life@hotmail.com   
Spoilers: Nope, I don't think so.  
Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own any of these characters. If I did, I'd be a very rich woman   
now and you'd be seeing this story on TV. :)   
Warning: Contains a F/F Relationship.  
  
It had been four months since she first kissed me. The best and worst four months of my   
life. Fibromyalgia had struck Abby hard. She was constantly fatigue but couldn't sleep.   
Her muscles ached all the time, and sometimes had unbearable chest pain. There were   
times when all she could do was to crawl up in a ball and cry.  
  
"Is Abby still on?" I asked Frank who merely nodded.  
  
"Well do you know where she is?" I asked. He nodded again.  
  
"Where?" I asked.  
  
"In exam three." He said.  
  
I nodded and quickly headed over, where, sure enough, Abby was stitching a middle-  
aged man's hand up. I quietly knocked on the window and she looked up and smiled. She   
said something to the man and he nodded. She stood from the stool and pushed the door   
open.  
  
"Hey." I said quietly.  
  
"What's up?" She asked, glancing back into the room.  
  
"What time is your physical therapy?"  
  
"Right after my shift ends." She looked at her watch. "Then I'm going back to my   
house."  
  
"Okay. That's good." I said.  
  
"I hope it goes well." She said.  
  
"Don't worry, they won't work you too hard the first time. It'll go fine." I smiled. "You   
feeling all right?"  
  
She nodded slightly. "I'm a little tired but I'll be okay."  
  
"Okay."  
  
"I better get back to this guy, I don't want him to get antsy." She said.  
  
"Okay. Call me when you get home." I requested softly.  
  
"I will." She gave my arm a soft squeeze and headed back into the room.  
  
"Dr. Chen!" Kerry Weaver called from in back of me. "We need you in trauma two.   
Multiple GSWs!"  
  
We worked on one guy for more then an hour. Nothing could be done. He had been shot   
once in the head and once in the chest. He was loosing all the blood we put into him. His   
wife arrived just as his death was pronounced. She nearly had a heart attack and we had   
to put an oxygen mask on her to keep her breathing regulated.  
  
I glanced at the clock my shift was finally over. I had been at the hospital all day and I   
was exhausted. I headed to the garage and slipped into my car, driving home quickly. I   
needed sleep. I needed food.  
  
Twenty minutes later, I flopped unceremoniously onto the couch. Throwing all of the   
pillows off I fell on my side and curled up; quickly falling fast asleep.  
  
I awoke to the sound of the phone ringing and quickly picked it up. "'Ello?"  
  
"Jing Mei Chen?" A male voice asked.  
  
"Yes? Who's calling please?" I asked, sitting up straight.  
  
"This is Detective Gilman of the Chicago Police Department." He said.  
  
"The police department?" I asked, confused.  
  
"Yes ma'am. I'm sorry to tell you that Abby Lockhart was killed by her mother in a fit of   
rage tonight."  
  
"WHAT?" I screamed into the phone. "WHAT?"   
  
"I'm sorry ma'am. I'm real sorry." He said.  
  
A soft knock was at the door and I opened my eyes and then shot up straight. Oh god, it   
was just a dream. Thank you. I stood and made my way over to the door, opening it to   
reveal Abby.  
  
"ABBY!" I screamed, pulling her into a tight hug. "Thank god, thank god. You have no   
idea how happy I am to see you!" I said pulling away and looking into her eyes. To my   
surprise, they were red and puffy and tears streamed down her face.  
  
"Abby?" I asked. "Abby honey what's wrong? What happened?" I stared into her eyes.  
  
"It…hurt." She reached for me. "It…hurt…so…bad." She squeezed me.  
  
"Oh god, baby. Honey, what can I do?" I asked, leading her to the couch and sitting her   
down. "What can I do to make it all go away?"   
  
"Hold me." She said and reached out for me once again. I slid next to her and pulled her   
into my arms. Holding her close I began to rock her slowly, never wanting to let go. "I   
dreamt that I lost you." I said quietly.  
  
She didn't say anything in response, just snuggled close to me and started to search for   
one of my hands.  
  
"I don't ever want to lose you." I said and carefully fell with my back onto the couch, so   
that she was now lying on my stomach.  
  
"You won't ever lose me." She said moving up so she could look into my eyes. "I love   
you." She said for the first time.  
  
"I love you." I said back without a second thought and kissed her tears away.  
  



End file.
